I almost wasn’t going to do this post. For starters, the word “douchebag” is being used more than ever. The more people use it as a put-down slang, the more silly it sounds. I admit it’s an immature way of describing people. Maybe because 2011 was a banner year for douchebaggery. Eh.
Where do I begin? Considering the past year had so many choices, all which nearly cemented my misanthropy even more. Almost.
For what I can see, 2012 already has a few candidates. Despite wishful thinking, it looks like 2012 just might continue where 2011 left off. We’ll see.
Anyway, back to some of the candidates for this ever-prestigious title. Who can forget Charlie Sheen? Who can forget his winning formula of tiger blood and goddesses? What cancels him out though was he supplied enough comic material to keep us running for the first half of 2011.Winning!
Jersey Shore. Could it be that they just might snag the honor for the second year in a row? Nah. Just let them burn themselves out, and eventually they’ll all wind up in your local AA meeting. Unless one of the cast members really needs the moolah. My bet is on Situation. Can’t you just see him on a program such as “Celebrity Rehab,” milking his 15 minutes for all its worth? Don’t even get me started on Snookie.
Then there’s these politicians vying for the GOP presidential nomination. Each and everyone of them truly deserve the title of “Douchebag of 2011.” Each and every one of them, but that would be too easy.
On the other side of the fence, Obama isn’t doing so hot himself, especially since he signed the NDAA act into law. Makes you wonder exactly whose side he’s on.
One strong frontrunner is Lt. John Pike, better simply known as “the pepper spraying cop.” The campus cop who causally pepper sprayed peaceful protesters in California. He’s kinda-sorta getting his already, since becoming a popular internet meme during the latter part of 2011.
In the end, the prize stays on the East Coast. The person with this dubious honor is none other than NYC Mayor Bloomberg.
Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg. The recipient of the Douchebag of The Year award for 2011. Congratulations.
Bad enough Bloomberg had his mayoral term limits extended; so when he was part of the NY Occupy eviction, he looked like a hypocrite. It wasn’t just the Occupy incident though. He was consistent all throughout 2011. Starting with the snow blizzard in the beginning of January 2011. You would think as a businessman, he would know better than not to be more prepared for a NYC winter storm. Anyone who has grown up in New York City can tell you, sometimes its winters can be pretty harsh. Yet, Bloomberg was out of town during this snowstorm, and therefore was severely under-prepared for the Dec. 2010 – Jan. 2011 blizzard. The result of his oversight didn’t affect most of Manhattan as much, but when it came to the outer boroughs, he failed. Passengers traveling on public MTA transportation was stranded for hours, as local buses broke down. In some cases, right in front of some people’s houses. Neighborhoods in Brooklyn, Queens and other areas weren’t plowed – in some cases, one or two weeks later. Bloomberg successfully managed to do what many others couldn’t….had NYC temporary shut down.
Bloomberg tried to make up for his winter fiasco by over hyping Hurricane Irene. Okay, I’m not saying Irene wasn’t dangerous, but it barely passed through NYC. Instead it had more of an impact in the more suburban and rural areas such as Long Island, Upstate New York, Massachusetts. Hey, at least the local supermarkets made a profit.
During the Irene press conferences, Bloomberg tried to not only warn city residents in English, but in Spanish as well. Normally, not a problem but he mangled the Spanish language pretty bad. He just should’ve hired a professional translator instead. It’s not like he didn’t have the funds. Besides, people needs jobs, don’t they? No comprendo.
When I was doing a bit of research for this blog post, I discovered this little fact; Mayor Bloomberg wasn’t even born in NYC, nor was he raised here. Bloomberg was born in Boston, Massachusetts, and grew up in the surrounding suburban areas.
Without further ado…here’s the Douchebag Of The Year for 2011, going to Michael Rubens Buttberg, er, I meant Bloomberg. Congratulations, Mike. Not only did you earn it, you deserve it.
Douchebag of The Year Award.
Model Behavior
Posted in alcohol, crappola a la mode, douchebag, life, misanthropy, music, pop culture, underground/alternative/subculture, tagged acting, actor, alcohol, alcoholism, Brian Presley, busted, caught being a douchebag, caught cheating, cellphones, Christian, christian actor, Christian actor Brian Presley, christian hypocrite, Christianity, dealing with unwanted attention, douchebags, fashion, fashion model, fashion modeling, feminism, flying, foetus, gender, Gia Carangi, gossip, hypocrite, internet, internet etiqutte, internet scandal, Melissa Stetten, men vs women, michele witchipoo, misogyny, model, narcissism, planes, pop culture commentary, post-feminism, potential slander, public image, relationships, religion, sexual harrassment, slander, thing of beauty, Thing of Beauty book, twitter, Twitter scandal, twittering model on June 7, 2012 | Leave a Comment »
So the other day I read this online article. It went like this; some married actor who knows all about the almighty power of Christ made unwanted advances to some model who knew the power of the almighty internet.
Oops.
I’m talking about the exchange between devout Christian actor Brian Presley, and model Melissa Stetten. Supposedly although Presley was married with child, he put the moves onto Stetten. A bad move indeed. She went on Twitter and posted the entire conversation. Her 13,000 Twitter followers read every word. Here’s the link to the article, in case you have no clue what I’m talking about: http://www.happyplace.com/16363/melissa-stetten-uses-twitter-to-humiliate-attempted-adulterer
Which I can’t help but wonder…aren’t you supposed to turn off your cellphone during inflight? And if she was able to get internet service while inflight, well then dude, what cellphone company is she using?
Anyway. First impulse after reading this article, you mutter to yourself “busted” and laugh. Perhaps you might post a link to the article you’ve read onto Facebook. Which is what I did. On the surface, as my friend puts it; “So ‘self-important douchebag’ meets a ‘big deal on the internet’ and a fight breaks out on the short bus.”
Yeah, pretty much.
Sigh…relationships. As the character Randal in the 1996 film ‘Clerks’ says: “I find it best to stay out of other people’s affairs.” It’s really no-one’s business speculating about other people’s relationships. Married, not married, separated, divorced, stable, ‘it’s complicated’, monogamous, open… who really cares? Is it really anyone’s business? Can we really pass judgment and speculate upon others? In reality, the answer is no.
Don’t get me wrong though. Do I have any sympathy for Presley, who fell off his Jesus juice wagon? Oh hell no. One of my pet peeves is hypocritical so-called religious folks. Like when Foetus once sang, “A Good Christian Is a Dead Christian.” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Dog4Rv0IhI ) If this story is indeed correct, well then the douche had it coming. The ‘self-important’ thespian was on center stage. Relationships are one thing, but using religion as a crutch, and then being an outright hypocrite is ten times worse in my opinion. And I don’t mean second coming. Unless he’s had his third, or fourth… oh! Bad joke drum roll please. Bah-da-dum!
All bad puns aside, you also have to consider this. Through this model’s Twitter account, we only know one side of the story. Hers. In reality, there are actually three sides. Her side, his side, and what really went down. In the day of digital gossip and hearsay, there’s a fine line between mocking someone and outright slander.
And let’s be real here. Not all women are victims. In reality, many women can be outright vicious and cruel. Melissa certainly isn’t a victim. Just like the majority of men can be assholes, the majority of women can be bitches. It’s the truth. (Is the author of this blog post, Michele, not a ‘people person?’ Why goodness gracious, you’ve noticed!) Also, one can’t help but wonder that if Melissa the model went a little too far with her tweets. Let’s say the model is the narcissistic bully here. She exaggerated this situation, and slandered for comedic effect, power, and media attention all for herself. Publicity at any cost. This is the same model who only a few months ago, claimed to have won some million dollar jackpot as a hoax, and then posted the prank online for all the world to see.
I knew women like this. Oh yeah, and men do this too. They love to slander, exaggerate, and collect blackmail. When the time is right, or when you’ve caught on to their crappy little game, they gather the evidence. As they collect all the dirt, they twist your words into something ugly, taking what you’ve said completely out of context. They’ll even sometimes outright lie, and then afterwards stab you in the back. When the knife is plunged, they’ll sprinkle a little touch of some spicy slander. In the game of life, this happens every day.
Yet on the internet everyone and their mother has an opinion. Just like everyone has a butthole. Mind you I’m being polite here. Some comments on one site briefly detailing this incident were actually defending not the possibility of this guy being slandered, but actually defending his borderline harassment. Ah, good old sexism prevails.
And ladies…we’ve all been there. At one time or another, no matter what we look like, we’ve all experienced unwanted advances at some point.
Back when I was younger, and cuter, and sometimes thinner, I had experienced situations such as these. Mind you, I was never as gorgeous as the Twittering model we speak of. So you can imagine that for every aggressive unwanted advance I had to endure, just multiply hers by a hundred.
Ironically I started re-reading this book titled “Thing of Beauty.” It’s about another model, Gia Carangi. Although Melissa Statten isn’t anything like former supermodel Gia, the book offers brief glimpses into the business of looking pretty for the camera. With that, here’s another way of looking at this situation. Melissa the model is in the business based on looks alone. She deals with constant scrutiny, sometimes rejection, and enduring upscale sexual objectification from shallow cretins. There’s a few exceptions, but as a general rule, a fashion model’s time in the limelight is limited. All that matters is your fuckablity, whether or not you show up on time for shoots, and if your look makes the chak-ching sound. Perhaps this encounter with Mr. Married Dramatis Personae was her breaking point.
You see, I believe that feminism and post-feminism doesn’t come from taking a whole bunch of ‘Women Studies’ classes in college, or attending pseudo-intellectual lectures. ‘Cause politically correct academia isn’t the real world. True post-feminism actions happen within everyday situations. Having to deal with continuing misogyny from both genders, that’s the real world. How about underpaid single moms worrying about putting food on the table. That’s the real world. Yeah, yeah, as of this posting it’s the year 2012, but as much as things changed, there’s still of lot that needs to be changed. Having to sit next to an overly aggressive, hypocritical dipsomaniac for a redeye flight – that’s the real world. And sometimes ignoramuses just don’t know when to quit it. So in the end, I’d like to shake Melissa’s hand, when she’s not busy tweeting.
Angry female texting. Art by Michele Witchipoo. Pen and watercolor, created June 7th, 2012.
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